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Write Here 15: What’s something you regret saying?
A Life Full of Regrets, and Still Not Enough
I regret a lot of things. I regret drinking for the first time when I was 16, because it left an impression of a feeling that I would chase whenever things got rough. I regret joining the beginners dance team during my first semester of college, a team that preached family but had more deception and double-crossing than between archenemies. I regret going to church every Sunday for 3 years when I didn’t believe, because now all that I’m left with is the guilt for wronging a God I don’t think exists.
The thing about decisions is that it leads you on a path that will forever be the making of your identity, and it’s hard to imagine who you would be without those decisions. Even though alcohol was my crutch for years, I found out that I stand stronger without it. Even though the deception among the dance family had me wary of people I previously labeled as “friends”, it taught me forgiveness and understanding that insecurities cause people to act in a way that is not a testament to their true character. Even though I’m still guilt-ridden by my supposed sins, I now have greater confidence in the belief I put in myself rather than a God I can’t see.
